Love ya Son, Rosie and little one to come. MWA!

I’ve got to admit 3 negative responses from your otherwise friendly control group isn’t too bad. The same question to my classroom’s parents would have generated a 96% negative and possibly hostile reaction.

In fact, today is the first day I actually needed to deal specifically with homophobia in the classroom. I’ve let numerous gibes and insults go unchecked this year as my 7th grade class come to grips with the power of words and their possible detrimental effects. Children use homophobic name-calling at first when they often have no clear understanding of what exactly it is or isn’t that they are belittling their victim with, so it’s often pointless correcting them when they haven’t the most basic understanding of what they are talking about.

However, after several months of enduring a steady rise in ‘you’re gay’, ‘you’re a fag’, ‘that’s gay’ ad nauseum, I finally gave the classroom a swift talking to this morning. It went down well as one student blurted out that her mum’s two best friends were gay - not exactly an every day revelation in conservative Turkey. Nicely for the entire class, the student who backed me up happens to be the most popular and influential in her Year, so I’m hoping that her approval will put an end to ‘gay’ as a term of abuse in the classroom.

Of course, it’s a small step in a culture in which homosexuality is about as welcome as a drag queen at a bricklayers’ barbeque, but it is an improvement.

I admire your willingness to undertake any project requiring contact with administration of the Dept of Education. I look forward to another update soon… take good care of yourselves.

So great to hear from you! I wish you’d had the opportunity to be at the ‘That’s so Gay!’ conference in Sydney a couple of weeks ago… it would have provided you with the same inspiration as it did me!

J and I were just talking the other day about the likelihood of you ever returning to Australia and whether the prospect of having babies would lure you back?

Socially and legally things ARE getting better here (with Federal Attorney General Robert McClelland announcing yesterday that the Rudd Government intends to address the 100 or so areas of federal law that currently discriminate against same-sex individuals, couples and families… )

You’d be a great dad AND we need more teachers like you here too!

Congratulations on taking a stand against homophobia in Turkey… that must have felt like a significant personal risk, so WELL DONE XX

Thanks so much for your words of support - they made my day… possibly week and even longer! It’s one of the unexpected benefits of baring your soul in a blog - the voices of support from community really help me feel like this is not a path I need to tread alone!

Hope you are well,

Sonja

A great read. I commend you on your courage and I hope this experience makes your family all the more stronger.

There are gay people i regularly work with, who are fortunate to have supportive families, but I had no idea the extent of the difficulties that gay people have to through in doing even the most pedestrian of things in life that many take for granted - like getting involved in your child’s school!

My mother who is a psychologist told me recently that same-sex relationships can be among the most unstable. I imagine not being able to live openly and having to defend all sorts of things plays a part.

I recently caught up with a dear friend of mine from high school whom i suspect is gay. They haven’t told me openly, but upon wisting their home recently there was a lot of compelling evidence that they were a bit more intimate with their housemate. It’s difficult for this friend to come out. their father is ultra conservative (in high school their household TV was electronically locked). They had a brother who was quite sensitive and progressive, but when their mother died, he went crazy and only got better through religion. so no go there. it wouldn’t surprise me if this friend has neither told their brother nor father about their sexuality. that’s not something easy to live with. after reading this, i’m not entirely sure being open is all that much easier.

with stats like 3/11, i’m not sure if that’s good or not. prejudice can still be potent irrespective of the quantity it comes in.

good luck, and I look forward to reading more. Best wishes, H